The Goblin Roller Coaster
by Luckysee12
Summary: Bilbo is abandoned by a cousin in a Roller Coaster ride line. At least theres another single rider to go with instead, who turns out to be kind of cute. Boffins oneshot


Once again Bilbo was reminding himself that he really should listen to the little voice in the back of his head that he should never listen to Drogo, that Drogo was a god damn traitor. His younger cousin had convinced him that visiting the local amusement park, Misty Mountain Park, was a good idea. To be fair, it had been at first. Bilbo didn't mind going on the twirling cup ride or the ferris wheel, and he did enjoy throwing rings over bottles and getting funnel cake that would do nothing but add a pound to his hips.

The day had been nice, and Bilbo did enjoy it, until Drogo dragged him into the long waiting line of the biggest roller coaster at the park, the Goblin. It was a hulk of a thing, sprawling across alf the park, and there had been several times he had walked under one of the tracks and heard the terrified screams. It was glaringly white with the front cart painted with large, almost comical blue eyes.

It left the station and made a sharp turn and went straight up what looked like several hundred feet to Bilbo. It then dropped straight down and back up into a loop of the same height. From the loop, it made a large curve and turned into a corkscrew spin and more turns and spins before coming back into the station.

Bilbo had reluctantly agreed and they stood in line for a time, watching a few carts head off. That's when Drogo noticed Primula, the girl he had been mooning over for years and coincidentally Bilbo's cousin on the opposite side of the family. She was in line a several paces ahead of them.

"I'll be right back, I just want to say hi," He stammered out to Bilbo before moving forward. Bilbo watched nervously as the line advanced and the blue eyes of the carts barreled above his head. He had never been good with heights, and his first roller coaster at age 14 made him so violently sick afterwards that he rarely got within proximity of one.

He had been reluctant, but decided to go on, because it had been 25 years for gosh sakes, he was a full grown adult, he shouldn't be frightened by a roller coaster of all things. And he had managed to stomach his fear mostly. That is, until he saw Drogo scale the stairs and get buckled in a cart with Primula.

"Shit." He muttered to himself. He had done all this mental preparation, and Drogo was going to leave him as a single rider? He couldn't do this on his own, but he didn't want to leave the line. How pathetic would it be if a grown man couldn't handle a single roller coaster?

"Ye a single rider ta?" An accented voice said as a hand clapped his shoulder unexpectedly. Bilbo was startled and turned to the man who had spoken. He had a wide smile on his face, and a dark moustache and beard, and had the strangest hat with ear flaps. "Mah name's Bofur. wood ye min' pairin' up wi' me? Ah was gonnae ride wi' mah brother but he's ower th' weight limit."

Bofur's smile was calming and Bilbo found himself agreeing. "That'd be fine. My cousin just left me for the girl he's been after." Bofur laughed deeply. "Ah know how 'at feels. Mah brother was heed ower heels fur his lady when we waur teens. They actually got married an' hae seven kids noo."

"Seven? Well, I suppose I can't judge, my mother was one of 12." Bilbo chuckled, shuffling forward as a group ahead of them was let on. "Hooray for abnormally big families, I suppose." Bofur laughed again, and Bilbo absent mindedly watched his dark eyes crinkle at the corner, full of laugh lines.

It wasn't until they were the next in line that Bilbo felt that fear curl around in his abdomen, and he listened to the dull clicks and whirrs of the tracks and the sudden whoosh as the cart plummeted, just like his stomach did.

Bofur placed a hand on his shoulder again and squeezed comfortingly. "Nae a body woods be mad at ye if ye didn't want tae go. God knows I'm nae tay keen on doin' this either." Bilbo nodded and watched as the coaster pulled back in and people got off. "No, I'll do it." He said with a bit of a shaky voice. He took a deep breath and scaled the steps when they called for the next groups.

Bilbo slide into the first cart in a moment of confidence, and Bofur slide in after him, and they pulled the overhead bars over them, Bofur taking his unusual hat in his hand. It took a bit for the rest of the groups to sit in, and a disgruntled looking overweight worker checked their seats to make sure they were secure. There was barely any warning before they began to slowly make the first turn. When they were going completely vertical, Bilbo squinted at the bright sky.

The spiral of fear squeezed tighter as they were nearly at the top, and Bilbo found himself grabbing at fabric that he noticed somewhere in the back of his mind that was not his. They reached the top, and the front leaned over the edge tantalisingly, and Bilbo was pressed forward against the bars, basically hanging over, looking down at the ground which was much farther away than he would like.

Bilbo felt his grip tighten, and felt a warm hand untangle it from his purchase on the scratchy fabric. Bilbo looked down to see that Bofur was holding his hand comfortingly and looked to the man's face, who winked just before they dropped and plummeted down at breakneck speeds.

There was the feeling that their stomachs were flipping as they spun and twisted and it seemed no time at all before they were back in the station. They released the bars and got out with jelly legs. It wasn't until they got off that Bilbo realised he still had Bofur's hand in a death grip.

"Oh-um, I'm so sorry, I-I didn't-" He stammered, his face turning red and flushed. Bofur smiled and chuckled. "It's nae problem." Bofur said, retracting his hand. "I really shouldn't have though-" Bilbo tried to apologize still.

Bofur put his hat back on his head. "Ah suppose if ye feel 'at bad, ye could make it up tae me by gonnae wi' me fur coffee sometime?." Bofur winked at him, and Bilbo's face got even more flushed. "I suppose that'd be alright." Bilbo muttered, resisting the urge to shuffle his feet like a schoolgirl.

Bofur found a pen in his coat pocket and scribbled his digits on Bilbo's forearm with his name and a little heart above it. "Call me sometime." Bofur said with a laugh before pressing a whiskery kiss to his cheek and bounding off.

"There you are Bilbo!" Drogo said from behind him. "I'm so sorry, Primula was scared and wanted me to go with her, and I couldn't just say no, but I feel really bad for leaving you to go alone and-what are you smiling like that for?"

Years later Bofur fished out an old photo for their adopted son, Frodo. "Ah booght thes when Ah first mit yer Da. Ah knew he was somethin' special e'en jist 'en." Bilbo punched his husband half heartedly. "You never told me you bought one of the photos from the kiosk." Bilbo accused, smiling.

The photo had the younger versions of them, Bilbo with the most frightened expression on his face, and Bofur with the biggest smile, both of them holding hands at the top of the Goblin. Now that Bilbo looked back at that day, he didn't begrudge him going ahead to ride with Primula.

_AN: Sorry couldn't help myself. I should be working on one of my already posted uncomplete stories or the monster of an AU that I have sitting in my WIP folder but I couldn't help myself, I just had to write some of my Boffins baaaabies. I adore them so much. The last paragraph just had to be included. In the paragraph you can either think that Drogo and PRimula died, or that Frodo isn't theirs and they are still alive, what ever floats (and not sinks) your boat. If anyone has a request for a story, shoot me a message and I'll see if I can do anything with it. Good night lieblings~_


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